Sightings...

In the summer of 1992, I went on my first Choir Tour. We went to Chicago and did Backyard Bible Classes with underprivileged inner-city children. It was an amazing, eye-opening experience for a spoiled 14 year old.

Before we were sent off on our tour bus, our pastor gave the 40-something of us a challenge he called "Sightings of the King." We each kept a journal and were asked to write about times when we saw the Lord working. It could be as little as a small act of kindness being performed, to something as life-changing as someone receiving Christ. It was a way for us to be continually reminded that God is at work all around us. It is so easy to get caught up in what is going on around us and "forget" that He is here, He is real, He is...

This whole after-law-school-life has not been at all what I imagined. I have had to fight disappointment, loneliness and the ever-present feeling of being completely and utterly overwhelmed. At times (more often than I would care to admit), I have given into these feelings and cried and complained and acted out in anger and frustration. I know, I know, pathetic, huh? Thankfully, I have a merciful Father and He has graciously let me pitch my fits (sometimes with painful consequences - I really believe that my stinkin' attitude has had something to do with my having been so sick this winter) and yet still He loves me and shows me time and again that He hasn't forgotten us and that He has a perfect plan for our lives.

Sighting of the King... Just yesterday morning on the way to church, Michael commented that he needs to visit a dermatologist. My first response was fear. How much is that going to cost? Our deductible is $250 and though that is pretty low, that's a lot of money for us right now. But instead of freaking out, I just took a deep breath and said, "O.K. I'll call about it tomorrow." We got to church, took the children to their classes and went to our class. Long story short, we sat right behind none other than a dermatologist PA (Coincidence? I don't think so!). He told Michael to call his office and tell the nurse that he wanted to see Michael A.S.A.P. - otherwise, he would have to wait 2 months to be seen. Now, I don't know how much this whole thing is going to be, but I do know that God ordered our steps so that we would meet this Dr. in our Sunday School class on the very morning Michael mentioned the need. I saw the Lord's hand in our lives yesterday morning and I'm not afraid (oh wonderful feeling!) because I know that He is going to take care of the rest. Praise the Lord for His peace!

To some, this may not be a big deal, but to me I heard loud and clear that I am not forgotten and that it really is going to be o.k. It was just enough encouragement for me to look forward to today and keep my eyes open for the next sighting of the King.

Still playing with pictures...

Well, what do you know... it worked!

Here's my first attempt to upload pictures... I hope this works. It's really late and I was playing around with effects on I-Photo, too. I noticed that when you enlarge the picture, we appear to be disintegrating. Not a pleasant thought. It's way too late! This was too many new things to be trying at once... :)

Toothy Perspective

The children were snuggled down watching a movie when Lacy crept into the kitchen with her right hand over her mouth. I knew something was wrong when I saw the tears dancing on the edges of her eyelids. She blinked, and opening her eyes as wide as she could, she whispered, "Mama, I think I have a loose tooth." I knelt down and wiggled the little white rectangle. "Yep, it's loose alright." I smiled, and she screamed - not exactly the reaction I was expecting. Thomas came in the room and said, "Lacy, that's cool! When you lose your teeth, you can do this." He stuck his bottom lip behind his two new front teeth - the teeth on either side missing at the current time - and made a rabbit face at her. She screamed louder and tears flowing she wailed, "I don't want it to go away! I don't want it to be lost forever!" I knelt down and held my sobbing "little bug". In true Isaac fashion, Isaac hunched his shoulders over and stomped down the hallway yelling, "It's not fair! I want to lose one of my teeth!!!" Lacy is now looking in the mirror, wiggling her tooth, and crying still.

I love you...

One of my favorite children's books is "Guess How Much I Love You". Not wanting to spoil it for anyone who hasn't read it, it is about a baby rabbit and mother rabbit expressing just how big their love is for one another. In our home, we've used a quote from one of our favorite movies, "I love you to infinity and beyond." When Thomas was about 4, he began to say, "I love you to infinity and beyond and back again." When he got a little older, he added, "I love you to infinity and beyond and back again for infinity." Just yesterday, I scooped up Isaac (all 51 pounds of him) and cradled him like a baby. I twirled around and kissed his cheek and said, "I love you, Isaac." He smiled up at me (showing his dimples) and said, "I love you to infinity..." he stopped, "I love you a million..." he stopped again, "I love you all the numbers in the world." He kissed me and finished, "And all the letters, too."

Thankful...

Blogging is, to me, a risky business. Anytime you put words down for others to read, you run the risk of having someone misinterpret your feelings or emotions. When spilling my guts out here, I don't ever want to sound like I am whining or ungrateful. I hope that whoever reads this will give me the grace to vent, misspell, goof on my punctuation and just be me. While these past 6 months have been amazingly trying, I know that I have so much for which to be thankful. I think it's a very good thing to remind myself of what I have - especially in the midst of hard times. As someone once said, "You don't become discontent until you start focusing on what you don't have."

I love the story of the elderly couple who was interviewed on a morning talk show for their 75 years of marriage. The host asked the gentleman, "What do you attribute to your having stayed together for so long?" The gentleman didn't hesitate. He squeezed his wife's shoulder, oh so gently, and tenderly replied, "If the grass ever looked greener on the other side, I just watered mine more."

'Nuf said. Here's a short list of things I have to be thankful for...

1 - My Abba Father. My only hope. My strength.

2 - Michael. My soul mate, my inspiration, my life coach :), the one who reminds me to give myself and others grace, the one who reminds me to laugh, the other side of me.

3 - Thomas, Lacy and Isaac. My ministry. When they are at eachother's throats, they force me on my face in prayer. When they play happily together, they make me laugh. When they are away from me, it scares me. When they are sick, I lose sleep. When they are hurt, I hurt. When they disobey, they break my heart. When they are sleeping - peacefully... beautifully - they make me pray that I will enjoy every second I have with them.

4 - My family. My best girl-friend, my sis, Emily. Oh the stories we could tell. My generous parents who taught me to love God and depend on Him for everything. My kid siblings Lauren, my workout buddy, and Jacob, my only brother; they are so great with my children. My awesome grandparents who have been there for everything in my life. Michael's family who love me as one of their own.

5 - All of my sweet friends. Their prayers, encouragement, laughter, girl's nights out, late night talks, game nights, shared meals, shared coffee, phone calls, e-mails and just being there have been such a blessing to me. My cup runs over with their love.

6 - Living in America. Need I say more? I'm just so thankful for our freedoms and pray that my children will be able to enjoy them, too.

7 - Music... My favorite past time. Emotions, passion, praise, prayer, memories and dreams. All this and more expressed through melodies, harmonies, rhythms and dynamics.

8 - Health. Wow... my stretch marks, pale skin, and occasional acne outbreaks are so insignificant when I hear about what others are living with.

9 - Exercise. One of the top 2 stress relievers. We'll leave the other one left unsaid ;)

10 - Rain. I love a rainy day. Everything gets washed and refreshed and cleaned. I love to go to sleep while it's storming - no better sound of nature than that of heavy rain falling on a roof.

11 - Date night. Dressing up, going out and falling in love over and over and over.

12 - Christmas. Lights, decorations, Christmas music, nostalgia, movies (Home Alone, White Christmas...) hot cider, parties, presents, family and friends... and most importantly, Jesus' Birthday.

13 - The future. With all the Lord has brought us through - especially this year - He has shown Himself faithful and full of grace every second of every day. To live really is a big adventure...

Elsie is a boy...

Before I forget, hehe, my sister's kitten is not a female :) Elsie is now officially Elliot the cat. Though I am not much of an animal person, he is a darn pretty cat.